Ok, I’ve posted this topic once before, but I am compelled to revisit it because those numbers are visually dominating my peripheral space. Ton’s of examples and the latest includes flicking the overhead car stats display, and it showed that I had 444 kilometres of travel remaining before I would run out of fuel. Later in the day, I check the progress of a hard drive defragmentation (yeah, yeah, … what a geek), … and it was 44 GB’s done, representing 4% completed. And countless examples of looking at the clock anywhere on the Southern hemisphere (1st rock closer to the sun away from 4th rock), or receiving messages at 4:44. Although I think I mentioned this before, I’m certain that my ‘body clock alertness gene’ has been trained now to magnetically seek the time 4:44 everyday. I’m sure I have the 4:44 genetic strain in my DNA. I hope that’s cool, and if it is, my future seedlings will thank me for passing this trait onto them. Explains a lot of things, … a lot of things in this context. In the year 444, the wheelbarrow invented by a Chinese artisan will gain worldwide use as a labor-saving device. Looks like a movie night tonight, need to go buy or rent “4:44 Last Day on Earth”, stars Willem Dafoe. Anyone else regularly see the numbers 444? Here’s the earlier related post on 444. Mars is the 4th planet from the Sun, it has 4 letters and a Mars day is 40 minutes longer than an Earth day. The Roman God Mars is the God of Wars, W is an M upside-down. Mars rules the sign of Aries, which is represented by a Ram. Rams is Mars back-ways. So cool having time on my hand to look things up. Did someone just mumble, ‘nerd’ …. ???

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there’s no way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can’t paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can’t paper do this to people? Why aren’t sheets of paper constantly suffocating people as they wake up each morning? I’ll tell you why, because paper can’t beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds, maybe 1. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, I’m sorry, I thought paper would protect you. What if you’re in hell and you’re mad at someone, … where do you tell them to go? Oh great, 4 out of the 5 voices in my head are saying to go back to sleep, so I’ll give it a try … again. See you peeps in a few more hours. My daughter Jess is back home, feels good to have another family support member, the psychologist says this will help me get through the grief process.

“Lying here with my skull feeling like a sealed receptacle of angry wasps. I have a headache, … in fact it’s nothing more than what I can ordinarily handle, but more sinister is the unwanted thoughts of despair and the loss of hope. This has been plaguing me for the past few nights, progressively getting worse affecting my beauty sleep. I imagine that people with my condition can lie lifeless in the dark or on their own without the frequent tossing around in bed. We don’t grow frustrated with passing time as it’s inevitable, so we just lay there allowing the brain to pursue it’s flurry of activity. It’s a shame that people who do so little for you control so much of your mind, feelings and emotion.” This was an excerpt written in my personal diary years ago, today I’m on top of things with a supportive network of people around me. If you are aware of someone close to you who are not really themselves, … reach out. Everyone needs to be told that they are valued, wanted, and appreciated. Just do it.

Just realised that my finger tips have been ‘blog oppressed’, so here I am, mustering up some thought recipe to engage whoever has a few spare moments to read anything. This spurs me to recall one incident about a month ago when I felt a niggling object in my shoe. Thinking that it was a small pebble or a piece of leaf, I started to engage my foot in some clever toe contortions. You know the feeling, sometimes you can nudge something into an unoccupied piece of shoe real estate so it no longer annoys you. No matter what I did though, it was all in vain. So I removed my shoe and gave it one good super optical scan, then shook it to death. Nothing. Odd? So I put my shoe back on and continued to walk, however the tactile intrusion continued. I once again removed my shoe and shook it to no avail, nothing dropped out. I rub my socked hoof against the floor back and forward hoping to dislodge whatever it was. Aha, there’s that feeling again, I quickly feel relief as my persistence is rewarded with the knowledge, that the thing was “in” my sock all along. So I take my sock off and to my nauseous surprise, a blood filled leech bounces onto the floor. It is soaked in blood because I had subjected it to a pretty vigorous foot massage while it was gorging on my lower appendage. My toes were stained with blood because the vampire slug had exploded. Due to the graphic and disturbing image of the dead leech corpse sprawled on the floor, and respect to the general leech populace I have decided to post one healthy smiley one from Google Images. Actually, I just don’t want to encourage any revenge attack. Any resemblance to real people, living or dead is purely coincidental.

Well, they say, it’s a bitch and what goes around comes around. Over the past few years, I have battled with this concept thinking that I must have played one helluva practical joke or prank on someone influential in my past life. Frankly, I just don’t think Karma exists. And how does Karma deal with those children who are subjected to abuse and violence? And how does Karma deal with war and the effects on innocent people? I think Karma was a sensible dictum instructing the mass not to engage in retaliations or revenge. Because we all know what happens when Peter hits Paul, well Paul gets angry and hits Peter back … next thing you know, rockets are fired over borders and tanks are rolling across fields. Did you know that World War One was started when someone from one country shot an important (but less liked) person from another country. Rather than settling the score right then and there, one of them secured the backing of Germany, and the other called on Russia for support, then one month later they came together for a ‘great fisticuffs with bullets’ … other countries joined in, and four years later and well over 20 million lives lost, the war ended. Shame the knowledge of Karma wasn’t as widespread in the western world as it was amongst the Hindu’s and Buddhist’s at that time. I guess in the end, the ability to deal with setbacks – or outright failures – is really at the heart of a successful, and happy, person. Over time and personally, I have found that some of life’s surprises can be really tough, and some people out there can be totally intolerable … but with the help from some truly good friends, a psychologist and the right ‘brain’ pills, you can indeed be treading along a happy place. Nighty night.